There I was

lying ever-so-innocently on the carpet, browsing through site after site for *my future* when BAM.

The ugliest, longest, fattest, most brown figurine captured my eyes.
A COCKROACH.
The bloody thing stayed stationary for a while and made its' move towards me. I CRAWLED UP THE FRIGGIN BED IN A HURRY AND THE HAIRY BEAST STOMPED ALL OVER MY LAPTOP LIKE IT OWNS THE BLOODY THING. Since when did cockroaches become such bosses?

So I'm gonna have a quick shower before bed and it's 3:06AM. Cockroach, I pray that you're out of the room by now.

Say that. 

And I'll give you this. 

And then this. 

Just because it seems like the most relevant thing right now.